First major thing I wrote on beepbox. I'm honestly still proud of the B section (0:58), I feel like the dual-voices is still strong and compelling. And I still love the "breakdown" (idk how else to call it) at 2:23, where I wanted to write homages to the existing thematic content coming in like intertwining voices. I feel really proud of this song. Even though it's the first one I was willing to share, it has those two pieces of music writing that makes me feel most connected to my sense of self and the voice I want to share.
Genuinely so happy with the marimba at 1:19. I will say though, the balance on this one is pretty bad on my thinkpad cuz I wrote it using a specific set of gaming headphones. And I didn't really test it with other audio.
(Will fill this in later)
Another song that really shows how much I love intertwining voices. The ghost duet that starts on the return of the chorus and goes to the end is really, really meaningful to me. It's hard to describe, but to me it represents some part of my deep love for Bach fugues.
Spend enough time alone screaming into a void, and you'll find your voice splitting in two. No longer along, you find out you're in the profoundly sad company of yourself.
I really love Ravel, and I really love Gaspard de la Nuit. Almost a decade ago I taught myself the first movement. This was early in grad school, so I mostly remember not having much time to do full-practice runs. It's a long and hard piece, and I could sit down and get maybe a page out reasonably good, but playing the whole piece requires so much mental endurance and I didn't have the time to train. This is the closest attempt I got, and I still had to cut because I made a song-ending mistake near the end.
When I was a kid I considered continuing studying piano in undergrad and becoming a professional pianist but I chose not to because I didn't want something I loved to become my job. I'm happy I made that choice, even if some part of me still wishes I could train up and play a full concert of my favorite music. It's funny because as a kid I didn't understand how people spent 8 hours a day practicing, but as an adult, I feel like I can see how much needs ironining out that would take so long.
I definitley cringe listening to this because of all the mistakes and the bad velocity control (if you can call it that), but I'm very happy I recorded this at all. I have very little proof left in the world that I can play piano, and it hurts my heart to know it's not a bigger part of my life.
If there's a god out there, please don't let my music die with me.